Well, once again, it pays to have an open mind and listen when someone comes calling. I know there have already been a lot of stops on this slow route to oblivion, but its seems that there will be just one more.
Yesterday I got a call back from someone I'd called earlier when looking for a place to move Lynda from the hospital. Cheryl McCulley is a social worker who has opened a private assisted living home in southwest austin called An Angel's Place. It is a nice home, large and small at the same time. It is a large home, with six bedrooms and two baths, new and clean and full of light because it is out in the country. It is an inimate environment, though, because there are only about five bedrooms for residents (Cheryl lives in one) and she currently has only one resident. It is certainly quite different from Marbridge, which, because it is an officially licensed nursing home, has requirements that make it, like so many others, an insitution designed for the lowest common denominator instead of for the individual needs of the residents.
And Marbridge is the best place I've seen so far, so this isn't meant as an attack on that fine organization. Indeed, the people there have been so accomodating and understanding that I actually regret the thought of their hard work having been in vain; yet I also know that I have to do what's right for Lynda, and my concerns for the insitution, any insitituion, are secondary at best.
And even though we haven't made it official, I feel that if I can pull this off, it will finally be for the best; I will have actually done something--anything--to improve the quality of Lynda's last days.
Today, when I wen to see her, she was sleeping, of course, turned on her side in a semi-fetal position. She acknowledged my presence with a 'Hello darling' but didn't have the energy to turn to me or even open her eyes. I told her about my plan and she shrugged with a half-smile of resignation and allowed that she would visit with Cheryl when she comes by to asses her later today.
This is not a done deal as yet, because Cheryl must go an evaluate Lynda's conditon to make sure she is capable of caring for her. It may well be that she is too far gone for this final move, but I don't feel that way right now. Honestly, there isn't a lot of care required because we have now decided that there isn't any 'therapy' that isn't directed at quality of life and that she be allowed to rest comfortably till the end. Yesterday she told be that she wished they'd 'just leave her alone' to get some rest, and this is exactly what I hope will happen if we can move her to the Angel's Place.
I feel a bit funny writing those words, especially because I sensed that Cheryl is very religious individual, but at the same time, it was comforting to see that she didn't specifically refer to God or any religion, keeping it in the more neutral synchronistic 'everything-happens-for-a-reason' frame of mind that I prefer. In short, we were in agreement about pretty much everything, including, for my part, the payment. In fact, even though it is a completely private-pay arrangment, it is also more affordable than the full-time professional nursing care that is required for Medicare/Medicaid.
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